I had a mini meltdown of sorts the other night. Of course it wasn’t really a meltdown in the true sense of the word but since I have a flair for the dramatic we’ll call it that and all because I went to the opticians.

Dramatic right.

Since baby no.4 was born I have been having terrible headaches and as a none headache person I felt they were particularly bad. If I woke up with one you can bet it wouldn’t cease to ache until bed.

Along with the headaches I began to get a slight blurring and seeing bits of dust in my peripheral vision – I have come to learn they are called ‘Floaters’ (an unfortunate name that makes me giggle every time I hear it) and actually quite common.

I reported this to my local ‘eye doctor’ (if I was an American) and they got me an emergency appointment.

After an hour of tests which involved placing my chin on one of those little chin balancing bars and slapping my forehead against cold metal machines, they concluded that I was loosing some of the gel at the back of my eyes. Nothing that serious, but if it continues it could detach my retina. (Worse case scenario)

She showed me the scan of the back of my eyes and I hate to report that although I gave all the right head nods and ‘yeahs’ I had no clue what I was looking. She even went on to say it could well have been all the laborious baby pushing that made my eye-gel (stuff) pull away. Ain’t that typical. So it’s not just my tummy and my ‘Doris Day’ that’s been annihilated but my eyes too!!

The opticians (’cause I’m British) said they would monitor it but not before putting some crazy acid in my eyes that enlarged my pupils and made me look like a crack-head.

Back home and unable to see clearly, drive or operate heavy machinery, I got upset. And by upset I mean my chin did that weird downwards smile thing like it was trying not to wobble with the impending tears. Why is something else now wrong with me?? Sure there’s a lot technically wrong with me but now I have a second medical reason written in my history!

This got me thinking about my kidney transplant that is, this year, nine years old. It is a ticking time bomb that could go at any point and that made me cry and then I cried some more that I even had juice left in my eyes to cry. Who knew our eyes bobbed about in gel? I didn’t.

Lord keep me where the light is…or at least keep it light so I can still see.

(There’s your drama !! 😉 )

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